There are times it seems life comes at you from every direction, oui?
No matter which slice of your life pie you try to neatly contain as you scoop it out of the dish, it has a way of falling apart, making a mess, and adding more stuff to all the other slices vying for a piece of you.
Out of sheer frustration it’s easy to slap an “I’m Overwhelmed!!” sticker on the whole gelatinous jumble.
I find there often follows two main reactions (both of which I’m personally familiar with)…
1) Try harder with more of the same approach
2) Run to the opposite corner and become underwhelmed
This post is for those who typically choose reaction number two.
Underwhelmed. That state of shutting down when Overwhelmed becomes your state of being.
To understand the deadening hold that being underwhelmed has, let’s define what overwhelmed is:
- overpowered
- overcome
- engulfed
- crushed
- beaten
- devastated
When life has dealt you one too many hands in a relatively short amount of time, the fight or flight syndrome tends to kick in. If your default button is set to flight, becoming underwhelmed looks pretty inviting. And, it offers a veritable smorgasbord of ways to flee…
- distracting yourself with something, someone, or chocolate (not necessarily in that order! )
- picking the easiest thing in the pile to attend to, which likely is not the single most important thing on your plate
- if overwhelm came via a relationship, doing a 180 – throwing yourself into work and more work
- if overwhelm came as a result of too much stuff and too many things, doing the opposite 180 – throwing yourself into playing and relating with everyone you know … and the list goes on.
Two ‘count on it’ outcomes of kicking in the flight afterburners is that –
1) The people, things, and stuff of life that made it overwhelming has not gone away; it’s just had time to congeal a little more.
2) Practiced habitually, flight (aka avoidance) becomes a way of coping,
which in turn slowly but surely deadens healthy, growing responses to life.
You won’t find me advocating for fight! fight! fight! Nor for the opposite of flight, flight, flight.
What you will find me advocating for is your ability to grow in understanding why you do what you do; how to determine what is needed when (developing discernment); and the wisdom of striking a healthy balance.
May we start a conversation today? (Hint: this is a good time to take a first step toward coming out of that underwhelm corner…)
There is a way which seems right (convenient) to a man, but its end is the way of death (ruin). Proverbs 16:25
I so totally agree! I think we miss out on a lot when we check out. Instead of setting healthy boundaries, we let ourselves become overrun and then eventually just run away instead of reanalyzing and adjusting. I know I feel this temptation when the overwhelmingness causes me to view others as takers. It taints my view of other’s expectations of me. I wonder if I’m alone in that…
Hi Connie! Thanks so much for sharing your honest reflection. I can assure you, you are not alone in your wondering…
We are perceiving people and situations all the time. Learning (which I find is ongoing!) why we perceive (or view) as we do is important for helping to make different choices; set those healthy boundaries, and come to enjoy living life in the Lord’s rhythm rather than by others’ or our own (perceived or otherwise) expectations. Shifting to asking Him, “What do You expect of me today?” might lead to some rich and quality time of listening to His voice 🙂 Hugs to you & miss you, Nanc
How did I NOT know about this page?! We need to have a coffee date, lady! Pronto! 😉 <3
Amanda! Thanks for stopping by. I would like a coffee date! You can reach me through the email icon on nancybentz.com. You might like to subscribe too…or like the Facebook page (Nancy Bentz, Life Coach). Nice to connect again 🙂